I know, I’m like a Cathy cartoon, always talking about my weight, but how can you be recovering from a 50lb weight gain pregnancy and not post about the arduous struggle back down the mountain?
So I’ve reached the 6 week postpartum mark…and let’s just say: It’s on. Oh, it is so on. The doctor said my uterus is all back to normal now, but how can that possibly be true when I still look quasi-pregnant?! (And I say “quasi” because it’s a horse of a different color now. I’m not dressing to accentuate my baby bump anymore. Instead I find myself dressing like Mrs. Roper (my sister’s line) to hide the small condo she left behind.) I like to think of what’s left around the middle as my FISBO, and I’m eager to sell.
I feel like a munchkin used to live here and I’m still trying to get dressed in her closet. I was so focused on the growing belly these past nine months, I lost sight of what else was growing all around me. I tried on what used to be a baby doll blouse of mine and I felt like, well…I felt like the Incredible Hulk in his teeny tiny cut off shorts. Did that blouse ever used to fit me? I remember it being drapey. It’s not draping. Was I really that small before? Because by the looks of things, my arms grew longer, my shoulders broader and I shot up about 5 inches with this pregnancy too! I thought I was going to turn green and start raging around the house, it was so tight! Look out Bruce Banner!
So bursting with new resolve and no longer under doctor’s orders to “take it easy,” I decided to hit the track. I got about a mile under my belt before I turned into a cripple and had to hobble the second mile. I woke up the next day weak as a kitten, but still hopped up on the elliptical and sucked down a V8 for breakfast, determined to make the scale move via sheer will power.
My new mantra: nothing tastes as good as getting my closet full of clothes back. You know how all cartoon characters only have one outfit? That’s me. I got one thing I can wear that looks half way decent and I keep wearing it.
Maybe I am like Cathy after all…