Clothes Horse


“Clothes Horse.” This is one of those American idioms I just don’t get. Does a horse really own and horde tons of clothes? Did you ever see a horse wear anything other than a big wool blanket?

But let me just say, it would be easier to dress a horse in clothes right now than it would my pregnant body.

I just spent way too much time online browsing maternity wear. I don’t know whether to laugh or to cry. Some sites feature models whom I’m convinced aren’t even pregnant, or at best, they just found out. Others? They feature busty models wearing frocks that you think are cute at first. You go to the store and it looks fab on the size two mannequinn. You buy it, you wear it all day, come home, take another good look in the mirror and then cry out, “I can’t believe I wore this all day!! Look away, honey. I’m hideous!” (Not that I’m speaking from experience or anything…)

I just need to pick a look and go with it. Like Lucille Ball. She had a whole entire season where she wore nothing but painter’s smocks with big bows on the lapels, pedal pushers and ballet flats.

Yes, that’s what I’ll do. Smocks and flats. And if I can’t find any smocks I like…

Just toss a big wool blanket over my back.



3 responses »

  1. okay, I had to do a bit of research cause I was worried i was the only one using the not-so-nice version. A clothes horse was originaly a wooden rack used to dry clothes. then with the advent of the dryer, the term changed to mean someone who likes a lot of clothes. and then the term changed again. so it’s not just me. also, along those same lines, I have a friend who likes to refer to herself as an “activity whore”. meaning she has to be busy all the time. going somewhere. getting out of the house. etc.

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